We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
