My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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