so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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