did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
