Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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