john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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