I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
