her vagine was all disorganized.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
