Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
