why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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