is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize