I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
