I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
