No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
