she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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