Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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