Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
