its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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