If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
