Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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