I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
