i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
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