So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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