I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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