He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
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