You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
