im gay
i know
yea but for you.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
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