i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
