Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
