Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
