He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
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