Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
