You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Randomize
