How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
