her vagine was all disorganized.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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