so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
