So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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