No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
