Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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