Well douche your snatch and let's go!
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
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