I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
