Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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