If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
