dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
