bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
