wake up i wanna do it froggy style
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
