You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I think i got beer on your cat.
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