We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
