Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
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