thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
